Fighting and arguing is part of married life – it’s impossible to avoid! From parenting styles to splitting up work at home, a couple would most likely fight with anything big and small. But these fights can turn nasty without warning – and it is dangerous to have a child witness, as it can negatively impact him. Read on for the negative effects of parents fighting in front of kids.
Signs Parents Fighting Affecting The Kids
Parents who argue in their child’s presence may prove to harm the child’s overall well-being and growth. The following are just a few signs that suggest a child is affected by the conflict of its parents:
- When he sees the parents yelling and shouting at each other, the child looks scared.
- The child appears to fight with the other children and does not get along.
- The child mixes little with other children and is mostly called anti-social.
- Kids show signs of misbehavior.
- If parents begin to argue and fight, the child tends to blame himself.
- Signs of depression are seen in the kid.
- In school and co-curricular activities, the child does poorly.
- The child could choose to be away from his parents.
- The child can complain about headaches, stomach pain or some other health problem to distract the focus of the parents from fighting.
- The kid begins to cry the minute he sees his parents arguing.
- The child is completely silent when he sees his parents fighting.
Negative Effects Of Parents Fighting In Front of Kids
Each couple has differences that are healthy when they are peacefully resolved. If these squabbles transform into big fights, however, they can have a nasty impact on the kids. So how do fights between parents affect a child? Some of the negatives effects of parents fighting are listed below.
1. Unable to focus on the study
Constant parental fights will keep the child’s mind pre-occupied. He may continue to worry about it, and may not be able to concentrate on anything else.
2. Emotional problems
Parents who fight physically in front of the child will cause tremendous emotional distress. Witnessing daily parental fights can cause negative emotions among kids. It leads to their becoming vulnerable. This vulnerability can lead to children suffering from many psychological problems such as anxiety and depression.
3. Relationship failure
Children mimic what their parents doing. When you are always arguing with your partner, your child will most likely grow up learning the same things. As a consequence, your child’s relationship with his or her partner will be influenced by adulthood. It can also lead your child to feel the need to avoid relationships because of the fear of getting hurt.
4. Low Self-Esteem
Mixed feelings of humiliation, guilt, indignity, and helplessness caused by fighting may have a toll on the mental health of the child. As a result, the child’s self-esteem declines, and on both professional and personal fronts, he can find it difficult to maintain a positive self-image.
5. Health Problems
Having their parents fighting regularly will make kids feel nervous, frustrated and powerless. As a result, those kids can either stop eating or over-eat. They can suffer headaches or stomach aches. They can also fail to fall asleep at night. Fighting between parents can cause behavioral problems in children.
The consequences of parents fighting in front of kids can be devastating. Children tend to believe in watching their parents compete and argue that this is the way to solve problems. Therefore, they try to settle their disputes with others in the same way. This can lead to broken and unstable relationships.
Points To Keep In Mind When Fighting In Front Of Kids
A couple will have their share of disagreements. Such fights shouldn’t go so far as to scare your kids, though. Read on to understand the things you should keep in mind when fighting before your kids.
- Evite long dragging the argument. Instead, resolve it with wisdom, and do it before your kids. It helps you and your partner to have resolution and your children can benefit from the experience that conflicts can be handled rationally and a solution can be found.
- Make sure the child never gets involved in your arguments. When the child feels like he needs to either pick a parent or take sides, he may feel torn and frustrated and may end up blaming himself for the loss of the fight.
- Your partner and you will refrain from calling each other names. Avoid screaming or threatening one another as this can hurt your kids. This ‘out-of-control’ anger within you or your partner will give the children a poor example and affect their views on relationships and marriage.
- You’ll likely disagree with your partner on such parental rules, just make sure you don’t bring them up while your kids are around.
- Seek to settle the arguments as they come up first to keep them from turning into big issues.
- During an argument with your spouse, tell your kids that you and your spouse both love each other and respect each other and that the kids will not be blamed for the fight.
- It makes them realize that parents can also have disagreements.
- Try not to lose the temper and apologize when you do. It should show him it losing one’s temper is not the key to a dispute resolution.
- Do not speak ill of a person in front of your child during a heated argument. Refrain from using derogatory words to reach out to others. Using a calm tone instead, and talk your issues out.
Conflicts and divergences are part of married life. It is entirely understandable that there might be differences between a couple. But the important thing is to work them out nice and come up with positive solutions. Parents have to realize how their fighting can impact the well-being, world-views, and temperament of their children. That is why they have to make sure that all fighting and arguing in front of children is done in a way that does not adversely affect them.
Also Read: Impacts Of Bad Parenting On Children